A nice little ditty dealing with the realization that the environment I grew up in was not a representation of the real world.
Can you forgive me
It’s all I’ve ever know
Can you forgive me
It’s all I was ever shown
Can you forgive me
It’s all I’ve ever felt
Can you forgive me
It’s the hand I was dealt
These are the questions I now ask myself
This poem was inspired by the Bad Religion song Billy. It’s an attempt to convey how a song itself can be an experience independent of it’s lyrics.
the near tangability
of the aural expression
like a warm blanket
on a cold night demands
that you embrace it
wrapped within its folds
wishing it would last forever
like the doorway to
another level of existance
the precipice of epiphany
the message convied
by the plastic platform
the patterns of
consonant and vowel
fade away into the
overall experience
of sonic signifigance
Another entry from the Purple Notebook, featuring everyone’s favorite theme, introspection!
Can I let it go
It’s shaped be for so long
If It continues to go on
It’ll take me like those before
I’m starting to feel how it is to break free
But I fall back to it so easily
And the funny part is it doesn’t feel like misery
A new poem that talks about how I sometimes feel trapped by who I am and the choices I’ve made. Rock on Purple Notebook!
It breaks upon the locks
Like a swollen river
A constant battle
As to which force is greeater
When one threatens to overwhelm
The other fights back
Emotion, the cause of war
Sanity, the field of battle
Ego, the sustinance of righteousness
Control, the price to pay
Well I got sorta smart and started writing all my poems in a notebook, rather than on loose scraps of paper. Here’s the first entry from the Purple Notebook.
It was part of the essence
Of the moment
More than the mere vibration
Of particles that form the wave
It’s tangibility was almost real
It enveloped as if a second skin
The reality of it
Permeation of the senses
Of the faculties
Could supplant the one
From which it was formed
It brought upon
Near-realization
Of the idea
The sensation
The revelation
Just over the horizon
To be that close
To that moment
Was the experience
Here’s another poem from some class I was not exactly paying attention in. Presumably this was done in my last semester there as I had kinda realized how bitter I had been being towards life in general. One of those poems that looks back and says what the fuck what I thinking?
Coming from a rural town
To a place where suburbia abounds
He tries to understand this place
But it’s brashness is shoved in his face
All these things astound his eyes
And be becomes desensatized.
He escaped this reality by believing lies
And became jaded and failed to realize
That what he hated and despised
Was what was really behind those lies
Backed into a corner and failing fast
His resolve is weakening at last
Pride torn and image smashed
Seeing his flag flying at half mast
Why is it you put yourself down
What is it that causes you to frown
Too busy living up to someone else
Not even sure what you want yourself
If you aren’t happy with yourself
Then you won’t be happy with anyone else
For being selfless comes from selfishness
And helping yourself helps everyone else
What goes through your head to make you think it’s right
The sick part is that it happens every fucking night
Tortured, battered and beaten for something they posses
There is more to these people than an ass and breasts
The line has been drawn and they will fight back
You are now marked because of your act
Better start running and fear for your life
Because justice for you is an eye for a eye tonight
If the roles were reversed I’m sure you wouldn’t like it
But when your will is broken and life shattered how will you fight it
Living in fear and the possibiity of reoccurance
Self-guilt and being scared make you endure it
Your selfish acts destroy lives
And your justification is bullshit lies
If you could see what you’ve done from the other side
You’d want to run and hide
What causes you to act that way
Do you know you destroyed someone’s life today
Don’t show your face around these parts
Or I will fucking tear you apart
You said we were friends but that was a joke
And now on your own words you will choke
And now that you take women for your own use
I hope you can suffer much worse for your sexual abuse
I see you changing for a better way
But I’m afraid it’s all in sway
For you say your changing for him and her
And this will become somthing bitter to remember
If you aren’t changing for you
It’s just not worth it
Be yourself and stay true
You’ll see it’s worth it
I’m not telling you what to do
Just trying to give advice
Don’t want to see you fall through
And end up in strife